Over 55? Back in the Dating Game? Some ‘Silver’ Thoughts

(DGIwire) – Anyone returning to the dating game in their mid-50s or older is bound to feel some apprehension. What are the challenges and pitfalls? How can happiness be found at this age? Solid advice comes from those in the Silver Disobedience™ movement. This is a large and growing group of men and women who are rebelling against ageism and living their lives to the fullest, and who have plenty of insights that can guide the path to new romance.

“By age 55, most people have had a few relationships and probably marriages,” says Merle Yost, a licensed marriage and family therapist. “They have a lot more data about what they like and don’t like, and what they find compatible or incompatible with themselves. There is a long list of deal-breakers so that when someone incompatible shows up, they know to head for the door.”

What about using technology as a way for silver daters to find romance? “Dating apps and websites are okay but should not be relied on exclusively,” Yost continues. “People tend to post their best elevator pitch and often out-of-date pictures and ages. Meeting people in non-pressured environments where they might already have something in common—such as clubs, organizations or activities—have a much better chance of having a happy ending.”

“The downside is that a potentially good match might be passed over too quickly,” adds Yost. “When someone is over the age of 55, they do not have a sense of endless time. The key is to have a sense of humor and know that short-term relationships are a possibility as well. Not everyone is going to find a match, so have fun and don’t take things too seriously. A person might just make a friend instead.”

Sandy Weiner, founder of Last First Date, offers further insights. “Being passive or guarded doesn’t work. At this stage of life, most people have experienced multiple breakups and heartache. If someone is projecting their past relationship ‘stuff’ onto their current date or partner, it is a recipe for failure. It is important for a person to work on their relationship patterns and date with dignity and self-worth.”

She adds, “Approach dating as the ‘chooser.’ Instead of going into a date hoping that the other person will find something to like, it’s better to go in with a lot of confidence. Confidence is sexy. For women age 55 and older, making the first move can work well.”

Through a collective of branded @SilverDisobedience social media pages and traditional media outreach, the messages of Silver Disobedience are heard and acted upon by a powerful audience. Its Social Media #Influencer Status is helping new understandings about “those of a certain age.”

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